Forty-One Years

Today is our 41st Anniversary.

We both are so grateful that we met and married young so that we had time to solidify our relationship before William was born. He entered into a household that was happy, well traveled, financially secure enough for me to stay home with him for nine years (though no vacations or new cars or fancy anything), a kitchen full of homemade food from scratch, family walks along the beach, bike rides and a lot of friends and family about.

We are grateful that we invited my parents to our house for a few days every couple of months. They became dear friends instead of parents, William actually got to know his grandparents and we all became very close.

We never, ever competed with anyone else. We set our own goals, we pulled and pushed each other forward, we kept our problems to ourselves and found the solutions on our own. There were a few times when we were close to broke. No one ever suspected.

One of William's girlfriends asked him what he fought about with us when he was growing up. His reply? "I never fought with my parents. There was nothing to fight about." And that was the truth.

Michael and I very rarely disagreed. I always said that we agreed on a goal but we often disagreed on how to get there when we were first married. It wasn't until years later that we realized that we no longer disagreed on the path. We had grown to think alike.

Years ago, I read about a study that interviewed long-term, happily married couples. The study was trying to find a common thread to a successful marriage. What they discovered was that the couples felt they had been fated to be together. When times were bad, they drew closer rather than having it tear them apart. There was never a thought of leaving as their relationship had been blessed by divine intervention.

We have always felt that we were fated to marry. Many marriages cannot survive a bad diagnosis of a spouse, yet we have drawn even closer than ever. We cherish everyday. He tells me I am going to live for many, many more years. I hope so. It has been one heck of a ride so far!