Papa Joe

The other evening, Michael and I were talking about Papa Joe. He married Mary when Michael was 16-years old.

It takes a brave man to marry a woman with five teenagers. He had a set of twins of his own who were 18-years old. He was a kind, quiet and gentle man. Michael’s grandfather introduced them to each other and Joe was the first man Mary dated since her divorce seven years earlier.

Before they married, she told Joe that she would be the parent to her children. She would do the disciplining. He felt his role was to totally love and support her so he never assumed a father role.

All of Michael’s brothers and sisters adored him. One of his nieces even married a man very similar to Joe because she had so loved him as a young child.

He died of thyroid cancer in 1990. Too young. He died while Michael was on the phone with his mom. I will never forget hearing Michael’s sobs.

For many years, Mary was in a depression. She deeply missed Joe. We all did.

Just recently, the clouds have begun to lift after twenty years. It has been interesting to watch her begin to grow and develop from afar. Her face has begun to lighten up, her smile is wider, her laugh is rich and deep and she now has begun to care about herself.

She is jumping back into life after all these years.

Next: Saying Goodbye to Grant