Haunting Death

Last week, a coroner in California contacted Michael’s niece Valarie, who we visited in Knoxville during our cross-country trip in May of ‘08. Her father had died. She had been searching for him the past two years. He had lung cancer, diabetes, high blood pressure and a few other problems. He was 57 years old.

Steve was living in a boarding house across the country from her. He had lost everything. He would be somewhat stable for years even with drug and alcohol abuse but still was somehow able to keep a job. Smoking dope everyday for decades does nothing to help ones health – physically or mentally. He liked to get stoned and watch porn. Not the best of men. Not the best dads. The older he got, the harder it was to maintain a job. Finally, he was fired and his condo was foreclosed upon and sold. The final downward spiral began.

This so explains the horrible childhood Valarie had with both parents involved in such a negative life-style until she had a baby and moved away. She found a group of people in Knoxville who gave her the stability she had never experienced before. She grew up quickly and became a hard working mom. Her son is amazing. After awhile, she invited her mother (Michael’s sister) to join her. They have cobbled a healthy lifestyle together and are very happy.

After he lost his job, Steve decided to visit them before his car was repossessed. He tried to move in and use them. He tried to bring drugs and porn into their house. They stood up to him and threw him out. That was Valarie’s last contact with her dad.

She is so struggling now because there will never be any settling of her relationship with him. He is gone.

My hope is that he is able to find the peace in death that he was never able to find in life.